What do you do when you fail?

What does it take to fail in writing? Not finishing a manuscript? Not having the heart and will to revise and polish it? Exhausting all possible agents and publishers? Giving up on a book, or on publishing altogether?

No matter how you define it and no matter your line of work, we all face failure some time. Jane Friedman listed dealing with failure as one of her five things that are more important than talent in writing (emphasis mine)

Everyone fails. That’s not the important part. What’s important is what you do next. Are you learning? Are you growing? Is your experience making your heart bigger? Or is it shrinking you down, making you small? Beware of cynicism and bitterness, because if these emotions stick around too long, they will poison your efforts.

I tend to think you only fail when you give up. It’s not success, but it’s definitely not failure to recognize that your current efforts aren’t making a marketable book better (or you happy or even sane). It’s practice, it’s experience, it’s another notch in your belt.

What do you think? What’s failure? How do you bounce back?

Photo by Hans Gerwitz

4 thoughts on “What do you do when you fail?”

  1. I have to agree that it’s only failure if you think it is. It’s really part of your attitude.
    At our family reunion this summer I shared a photo of a painting I’m working on with one of my husband’s cousins. She is a revered and well known artist whose work hangs in galleries. She looked at my painting and said, “Isn’t there some community class you could take where they could teach you how to paint?” I was stunned. I didn’t know what to say.
    I let it get me down for days until my husband said, “Why do you paint?” I told him that I paint because I love it. “Then don’t let someone else dictate how you feel about what you do,” he said. Later I found this quote,”Keep away from people who try to belittle your ambitions. Small people always do that, but the really great make you feel that you, too, can become great.”?Mark Twain
    That’s why we have writing and blogging buddies to remind us we can do it.

    1. Oh, Cathy, that’s horrible! How could anyone, especially a relative, say such a thing?

      I love your husband’s response, though. It inspired a blog post for tomorrow!

  2. I agree with Edison =) I don’t know who said it but I love the saying ‘Success is staying on your path.’ Likewise, failure is straying from it. When I fail I stop to figure out where I need to be and how to get back there.

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