All posts by Jordan

First Crusader Challenge

As part of the Writers’ Platform Building Crusade, we have weekly Crusader Challenges. This week’s a getting to know you exercise. Although we have 300 words to bloviate in, I had a couplet come to me last night, and just knew I had to write a limerick.

Running was not my best gambit.
I’d prefer a fuliguline habit*.
          I’m (mostly) kind to others,
          and have only brothers,
whom our parents replaced with a rabbit.

Yes, this is why I write prose. Poetry requires such an incisive editorial blade. I’m afraid I’ll just stab it. Erg… (You can see why that line got cut from the poem…)

(Actually, once upon a time, I was the poetry editor of a fairly big site. But I didn’t have to judge or write poetry, so no one was injured.)

Something I mentioned about myself isn’t what you might call . . . “true.” Can you guess what it is?

Monday (I hope) we’ll jump into how to infuse your writing with emotion!

Photo by Graham White

Emotion: how we get in our readers’ hearts

This entry is part 3 of 14 in the series Emotion: it's tough

Emotion is vital to fiction. Without emotion, our books can read like bad history textbooks: a log of who did what, where, and when. Some history stories are moving enough to catch our imagination, but those are rare.

If we want our readers to care about our stories—our characters—we have to grab our readers (and our characters) by the emotions.

This is something I’ve had to work hard on in my fiction. I’ve usually run under the assumption that my readers could infer how my character felt. Until I got that dreaded feedback: “This scene drags. It’s boring.”

Boring? Boring?! I thought. Can’t you see the emotional turmoil she must be in? The moral dilemma this puts her in?

Um, no, they couldn’t—because I didn’t put it in there. For all they could tell, the character didn’t care. She was impassively watching the scene unfold, or participating without any trouble. Setting up a situation just isn’t enough: you have to show how that situation affects the character as it unfolds, or we’ll have to assume it’s not.

Compare:

Andrica grabbed the rope with both hands. She stared at the ground thirty feet below her. Her palms slipped a little.

She looked up. Above her, footsteps echoed across the rooftop she’d jumped from. They were going to come after her any minute.

But she could get out of this. She had to. She just needed to think.

No, she needed to act.

She’s in a pretty precarious situation—but do we really care about the outcome?

Andrica grabbed the rope with both hands. Her heart beat in her throat, but the thrill of triumph quickly faded. She dared to peek at the ground below. It should have been only thirty feet down, but her vision swirled dizzyingly. Her stomach plummeted and her clammy palms slipped a fraction of an inch.

She willed herself to look up. Above her, footsteps echoed across the rooftop she’d jumped from. They were going to come after her any minute. Adrenaline sang in her veins, making coherent thought impossible.

But she could get out of this. This time, she had to. Andrica forced a deep breath into her lungs. She just needed to think.

No, Aryn needed her—he needed his mother. She had to act. Now.

Now, not only do we watch what she experiences, but we know what she feels. And if the author does it right, we feel what she feels. And that‘s the way to creating powerful characters and stories.

Next, we’ll move into how to add emotion in your writing—and how not to.

What do you think? How do you like your emotion in fiction?

Photo by Steve Ventress

Romance Blogfest is on!

The Romance Blogfest is closed. Thanks to all who participated!

How to participate (and rules)
1. The theme is Love at first sight . . . or not so much. Post a first meeting between two characters who will fall for each other (even if it doesn’t look like they will at the time!).

You may write a new scene on the topic, OR you may post a scene from your WIP. [This doesn’t preclude completed works. Because, after all, no work of art is ever finished, only abandoned.]

This should be a given, but all scenes should be clean (i.e. no sex [what kind of first meet is this?], limited violence and language [again, what kind of first meet is this?]).

2. Post your scene today, and link your post back to the blogfest here so your readers can read other entries, too. (The easiest way to create the link will be to cut and paste the code for the badge below into the Edit HTML tab on your post.)

3. Add your to the Mr. Linky below. Use your name (or your name@your blog’s name, or your blog’s name), and the link to your post (i.e. http://myblog.blogspot.com/2011/02/my-post.html) and NOT your blog (i.e. http://myblog.blogspot.com).

4. Read, enjoy, and comment on other entries! Scroll down (or up if you’re in a feed reader) to see mine and use the list of links to find others’!

Want the badge? Copy this and paste it in the HTML of a blog post or your sidebar:

<a href="https://jordanmccollum.com/romance-blogfest/" title="Romance Blogfest. Photo by José Carlos Norte" style="text-decoration: none;"><img src="http://i192.photobucket.com/albums/z41/MamaBlogga/airomance.png" width="300" alt="romance blogfest badge" /></a>

Want it bigger or smaller? Change the number at width="300" to adjust the size.

Sign up here!

Use your name (or your name@your blog’s name, or your blog’s name), and the link to your post (i.e. http://myblog.blogspot.com/2011/02/my-post.html) and NOT your blog (i.e. http://myblog.blogspot.com).

(If you signed up on the announcement post, please add the link directly to your post here on this new Mr. Linky! Your link is still up on the announcement page.)

  1. Jordan McCollum
  2. Nichole Giles
  3. Joyce DiPastena
  4. Carol J. Garvin
  5. Tamara Hart Heiner
  6. Canda Mortensen
  7. Rachel Rossano
  8. Don Carey
  9. Krista Lynne Jensen
  10. Rebecca Shelley
  11. Gail Zuniga
  12. Heather Justesen
  13. Angie
  14. Lisa Asanuma
  15. Christine Bryant
  16. RaShelle Workman
  17. Carolyn Frank
  18. Danyelle Ferguson
  19. Rebecca Blevins
  20. Regina Andrews
  21. Andrew Rosenberg
  22. ali
  23. C. Michelle Jefferies
  24. Debbie Davis
  25. Robbin Peterson
  26. Marsha Ward
  27. Marta O. Smith
  28. Andrew Williams
  29. Erica aka Mightymouse
  30. Sharon Gerlach

Stay tuned for our series on emotion in writing!

Blogfest badge photo by José Carlos Norte

Love at first sight (or not so much)

It’s the Romance Blogfest! The official post should immediately follow this one.

For the Romance Blogfest, I knew exactly what scene I wanted to share: the original opening scene from the manuscript I’m now calling Saints and Spies. This is now my fifth published novel, Saints & Spies!

This is kind of a deleted scene: I decided it would be better from the heroine’s POV. Now it’s the third scene of the manuscript. You can see how it’s changed in the excerpt from the award-winning first chapter (it’s now the third scene).

Please note this is basically an unedited rough draft! And I’m resisting the urge to polish it. *tic*tic*tic*


Zach took a deep breath of the musty air of the small church. It was nothing like the chapels he was used to, of course, but he had act like this was his new home.

“Father?” A woman’s voice came from behind him. Dublin accent. Zach closed his eyes for a moment, briefly reveling in the once-familiar sound, before realizing she was addressing him.

“Yes, my child?” He turned around and found the most beautiful Irish woman he’d ever seen—and that was saying a lot, considering he’d lived in Ireland for two years.

As if they knew exactly how to tempt him.

“You’re Father O’Leary?” She raised her eyebrows in surprise, and her expression showed off her deep blue eyes.

“I am.”

“Oh, but you’re so . . . young.”

Zach smiled sheepishly. “Some of us heed the call earlier than others.” He tried to keep his expression unchanged as he scrambled to remember how long seminary was supposed to last.

Four years after college. So at twenty-eight, he was not only a menace to society but also old enough to be a Catholic priest. Of course, he’d only spent two weeks in seminary. Unless you counted four years of early morning seminary in high school.

Somehow, he didn’t think that would count for this parishioner. “And what was your name?”

“Oh, I’m sorry, how silly of me. I’m Molly.”

“Pleased to meet you, Molly.” Zach offered her a hand and she shook it. This would probably be easier than the mission. After all, as a priest, he could still hug members of the opposite sex.

Then again, that might not be any easier. And he’d been home from the mission for seven years. This mission might well be completely different.

“Now, Molly, is there something I can help you with?”

Molly laughed and Zach couldn’t help but smile in return. “I believe I should be askin’ you that—I’m the parish secretary.”

“Oh, good—I guess this is all a little new to me still.” Understatement of the year, at least.

That was probably enough of the commentary on how weird it was to be a Mormon—and an FBI agent—posing as a Catholic priest. If all he could do was think about how funny this really was, he was never going to take this mission seriously.

“Well, what would you like to see first?”

Zach glanced at the suitcase at his feet. “I suppose the rectory would be a good place to start—there is a rectory, right?”

“There is.” She smiled again, but her smile quickly faded as if she were suddenly self-conscious. Zach realized he was returning her smile with perhaps a bit too much charm. He wasn’t supposed to be flirting with her, no matter how pretty she was. He was a Catholic priest now.

And he wasn’t Zach Saint, either. He was Father Tim O’Leary. For now.

“Have you spoken with Father Fitzgerald yet?” Molly asked as she led Zach to the rectory.

“No, I’d only just gotten here when you found me.”

“We’ll introduce you.”

Molly opened the front door to the rectory—unlocked, naturally—and admitted Zach. The living area wasn’t much, but it was better than any apartment he’d had on the mission.

“Be sure to let me know what you’ll be wantin’ for your meals.”

Zach turned back to Molly, one eyebrow raised. “Oh, are you the cook, too?” He belatedly turned down the level of flirtatiousness in his smile.

“Well, in a manner of speakin’.”

“Is that really in your job description?”

Molly shrugged. “Father Patrick says—said,” she corrected herself, glancing down a moment as if to memorialize the slain priest, “that it was more important that he and Father Fitzgerald tend to their ministries than spend their time cookin’ and cleanin’.”

“You clean the rectory, too?”

She smiled shyly and looked away.

“Molly, you won’t—you don’t need to do that for us. For me, anyway.”

She nodded and changed the subject. “Father Fitzgerald’s mobile phone number is by the phone.” She pointed to the kitchen wall where the telephone hung. “And the desk number. Just call me if you’ll be needin’ anythin’.”

“That I will.” Zach glanced back at her, but she was already gone.

Focus. It wasn’t like he’d never had to work with a pretty girl on a mission.

Granted, he’d never had to work with a pretty Irish girl.


Read the rest of the Romance Blogfest entries!

Why emotion?

This entry is part 1 of 14 in the series Emotion: it's tough

A version of this post originally ran on 12 July 2010.

Last summer, after I had baby #3, I went on a reading spree. I read a lot of great books, but after more than a month of devouring award-winning (and not so much) novels, I hit the wall. In less than a week, I started a number of books that just didn’t reel me in. They didn’t “seduce” me. Reading them was, frankly, a chore.

I did skip to the end of the novels, but largely so I’d never, ever be tempted to pick them up again. (If your novel makes sense without the middle 100 pages, something might be wrong…) Telling vs. showing was the main problem. I said it was like the author was standing in front of me, holding up a curtain as he dictated the action on the other side.

Although bad writing is always a turn off, it’s not always enough to make me give up on a book, or at least half of it. Some of the books I just couldn’t not put down lost me in character soup. Ten characters in the first five pages is way too many—especially when for some reason, we have to dip into each character’s POV for a paragraph or two, even if that character is 2000 miles away and not having a scene of her own! In another case, the story was told from one character’s POV, but by the end of the first chapter, we’d met so many people I couldn’t remember which character that was. And I kept forgetting in subsequent chapters.

I think both of these issues stem from the same problem: a failure to get the reader (me) involved in the characters. Something about the narration style (telling) was too distant or confusing for me to make an emotional connection and sympathize with characters. And I’m realizing that life’s too short for boring books (or boring novels, anyway), so I’m not willing to persevere through a hundred pages to see if I suddenly start liking a character.

No, I don’t believe characters have to be likeable to be sympathetic—but man, they have to inspire me to feel something!

What do you think? Why is emotion so important in writing? What keeps you from relating to a character?

Photo by Wade Kelly

Okay, for real this time.

Remember the romance blogfest Monday!

All right, so remember how I promised I’d tell you how I’m doing at my goal of getting up early to write? Yeah, lousy on that, and lousy on the getting up early. I forgot about one very important thing when I set that goal: my now-8-month-old likes to get up before 7 anyway. So she’s really helped me get up early every morning. And I’m basically a vegetable after that.

Still, I apparently need some sort of impetus to get going on the WIP I really wanted to finish six weeks ago, but have only tinkered with since November. So (as soon as I finish what I really really really really really mean is my last, final, conclusive set of revisions and finally submit), I’m jumping on February’s Ninja Novel Writing Month!

Which makes me think of this:

I’m also enlisting in the crusades. The Writer Platform Building Crusades. Because, hey, I need more friends. Don’t you?

What’s coming up for you this month? Aside from a certain blogfest, of course.

Let’s get emotional

This entry is part 2 of 14 in the series Emotion: it's tough

Remember the Romance Blogfest coming up on February 14, just one week away!

It’s time for another series! I’ve been pondering this one for a long time because emotion is vital to fiction. And what more emotional month is there than this one? Love, hope, disappointment, despair—and that’s just on Valentine’s Day! 😉

We know that most readers read for an experience. New circumstances and exotic settings do give our readers an experience. But to truly immerse them in our characters stories, we need emotion.

But, just like in real life, emotion in fiction is tough. It requires just the right touch to know when and how to put it in, a fine balance to know when to leave it out, creativity to avoid clichés and reaching deep within ourselves for authenticity—possibly even exposing some of our hidden inner lives to the entire world.

It’s easy to rely on clichés, to tell what the character’s emotion is, to underwrite to the point of apparent sociopathy or overwrite to the point of purple prose. But easy writing is seldom powerful writing, and seldom powerful reading. To really reach (and hook!) our readers, we have to get to their emotions. So this month, look for posts on effectively creating characters’ emotions!

Got something you want to say about writing emotion? Guest post! Email me at jordan (at) jordanmccollum dot com for the full guidelines—but I do have limited slots, so hurry!

Photo by Peter Dutton