We’ve all met people with funny names. I have a friend whose mother-in-law’s name is Lynn Lynne. I played a prank on a friend once, claiming I was going to marry someone with the last name Gordon (and my first name is Jordan, remember?). And of course, my father shares a name with a very famous early US statesman.
In real life, these humorous names often happen by accident (especially if you’re a woman). My dad’s mother, for example, had already picked out Dad’s name before she met my grandfather and thus learned what last name her children would have. (It was the name of her favorite mule…)
In fictional worlds, we get to pick all our characters’ names—so hopefully, we get to avoid these embarrassing “nom” pas . . . but only if we’re really thinking.
Sometimes we choose funny or odd names on purpose. I chose the last name of Saint for one of my characters because it set up a number of jokes. I named another character Molly Malone for the same reason. (Poor characters…) Of course, for Molly, I had to explain how she came to have that unfortunate name. Same went for the tongue-twistery Cora Warren.
And sometimes . . . well, we’re just not smart enough to realize what we’ve done at first. For example, I once had a character with the first name Kent. I needed a nice strong surname for the guy, so in the next scene, he became Mr. Clark. It was a little while before I put the names together.
Kent . . . Clark.
Uh. Yeah. (His last name became Thornton soon thereafter. Borrowed from someone I knew IRL.)
And my most recent character naming accidents came in my Nano novel. Just before another book was accepted, by coincidence I wrote one of my villains sharing a surname with my editor. (It was not a coincidence that another villain shared the same editor’s first name. I changed that.) But the biggie was the hero—and you know how hard it is to change the hero’s name!
Most of the time, it wasn’t a problem. He went by Jack, a nickname from his last name, Jackson. (Which set up some jokes, too, of course. This trend is becoming disturbing.) It was a great name for him.
And I thought his first name was perfect, too. Kerr. (It was a drug store and a lake where I grew up, and my dad had a friend named Kerr when he was a kid. Not that I ever knew him, but I knew it could be a given name.)
If you haven’t seen the problem yet, let me tell you: when his real first name came up, this character often had specify either the spelling or the pronunciation. Let me treat you to a now-defunct conversation from the novel: in this scene, their car has been reported stolen and is about to be towed.
They hurried across the street, Jack trying to compose his thoughts so he could pull this off. The stunned disbelief and confusion wouldn’t be too tough, but the innocence would be a stretch. [They have something stolen in the trunk. Which, sadly, will also end up on the cutting room floor.]
“Whoa whoa whoa,” he said, jogging up to the officer. “Is there a problem here?”
“Is this your vehicle, sir?”
“Yeah. Did I park illegally? The sign says no parking Monday to Friday.” Jack pointed to the sign. [It’s Sunday.]
“No, sir. This car has been reported as stolen.”
“No, no—no. This is my car. It has been for seven years.” Unless his brother had changed the registration into his name when Jack left home—but still, it should all check out.
The cop raised an eyebrow and read something off the clipboard in front of him. “License plate 267 VAP?”
He nodded. “All me.”
“Registered to Kerr Halsey Jackson.”
“It’s pronounced ‘car.’ As in, ‘This is my car.’”
The cop folded his arms. “I’m going to need to see some ID.”
So what’s the problem?
His name is Kerr Jackson. Pronounced Car Jackson. Let me try that again: pronounced CAR JACKson.
I realized this two days before I finished the novel. He got a new first name—but I’m definitely going to reuse Kerr. Maybe with the last name . . . Hop?
All right, top my stories: what are the craziest, funniest or silliest things you’ve named characters, on purpose or by accident? Did you change them?
Photo credits: Superman by Greenog; car jack by Cameron Flanders
Too funny. I’ve had many bad name combinations that have made me laugh. Usually I delete them but I should start a file just for that. One fantasy novel I was working on (still sitting at 1/3-1/2 done) was especially bad. I was creating names and looking for resonance by giving them just the right sound. I ended up with a Harly Potter before I caught it. In my defense, the man was actually a potter. He had a RIGHT to that name, by gum. I ended up changing his first name but I doubt that even Potter will make it through the first revision.
Niiice.
Oh, Jordan, that’s funny. If your mother-in-law lives around here, her friend might have been one of my election judges. Small world!
A friend of mine’s husband had a friend growing up whose name was Forrest. Only problem is his last name was Burns.
Ouch. My roommate’s little brother was a Harry Payne.
Not my MIL, a friend’s—I have no idea where she might live, I just saw the name on my friend’s wedding announcement. Sorry!
In Not My Type, the MC is Pepper Spicer. Her siblings are Mace, Coriander, Ginger, and Rosemary. Which sounds ridiculous but I think it works because her parents know this and did it for exactly that reason.
More of the tough love, eh? I haven’t gotten out to pick up NMT yet. So did you explain the parents’ reason in the book?
In my current work-in-progress, one of my main characters is named Henry (named after my own sweet 4 year old son. And also because this guy? He’s just a Henry. It fits so completely, I couldn’t not use the name.) His last name is Jacobson, which is all nice and normal. BUT… He was adopted when he was five years old, and while having a conversation with his friend Eliza, he tells her that before he was adopted, his last name was Higgins. I swear it didn’t register until I read it back through a few days later. HER name was Eliza, and HIS name was Henry Higgins. Heh. I’m sure it came from somewhere far back in my subconscious… it’s been a while since I’ve seen My Fair Lady, but how can you forget Eliza Doolittle saying, “Eh-low Enry Iggins!” (And yes. Henry got a new last name!)
LOL! Nice one! Poor Professor Higgins.
Yep, you’ve got to be careful with your character names!!! I consider myself quite fortunate that I didn’t get given an awful embarrassing name or series of names, myself.